Tributes

Read by Lydia

Our Dad was one of the kindest, most generous men I’ve ever met. He was the best Dad we could ask for. He was strange and sometimes very embarrassing, but we wouldn’t change him for the world.  

He absolutely loved being a Dad. Recording with his video camera our first experiences of this world, every birthday, holiday, first day of school right up to school proms. He’d then edit these videos and add music to capture the best moments of our childhood to relive whenever we wanted. Other ‘Dad duties’ Dad revelled in was driving me and my sister pretty much anywhere including moving us in and out of University. He bought a chauffeur hat specifically for this job. I will never forget him picking us up from Manchester airport after our adventures, his huge grin and happy face perched under his chauffer hat. He always used to say ‘that’s what Dads do’. 

When I got my first job he was bursting with pride. He came down to London to meet me at the office after work and see my in my suit, then even ended up getting a visitor pass to go upstairs and see my desk. I feel so lucky that he’s probably the only Dad to have done that, and yet he replied his typical “That’s what Dad’s do”.   

Growing up we used to have ‘Dad and daughter days’ where my sister and I would take it in turns to spend 1:1 time with Dad. This might be a museum or nearby City, my last one with him was a “trip down memory lane” as he used to call it, where we drove around Liverpool and he showed me where his parents grew up and where his grandparents were buried. These were the days we could connect with Dad more than ever, really understanding the man who loved us so much. 

Read by Eleanor

When you combine a kind generous man, keen Dad and love of travelling, you get a Dad that will follow you to the far corners of the world to be with you and, in his words ‘see if you’re having a nice time’.  

When I got a job at Pennsylvania State University, USA, we flew to NYC together and hired a car to drive me 7 hours to my new home. His highlight of this journey was driving past his favourite building, Empire State Building where 3 years later he would spend his 60th birthday with friends and family. Arriving at Penn State we were both perplexed by the simple differences in American living, but we figured it out together. Dad not only helped me through what could have been a very stressful and lonely experience, he raised me with the drive and financial stability to make the whole thing possible. Regularly telling me while growing up that ‘the world is my oyster’. He did the same for my sister, joining her when she moved to Paris and Dubai, taking her to the local supermarket to make sure she was stocked up on essentials and settled in. Whenever we thanked him he would always say ‘that’s what Dads do’.  

Anyone that knew our Dad will be familiar with his dry sense of humour, never really knowing if he was joking or not. He never used to mind embarrassing himself if it made others laugh. In particular he loved embarrassing my sister and I growing up, ensuring he was centre of attention when we had friends over as they were (in their words) ‘part despairing, part in stitches with his punny, deadpan humour’.

Its been so hard to think of one specific example that captures his humour but this one comes to mind:

When I was 16 I was invited to a 18th party for someone in the year above. Needless to say my friends and I thought we were very cool, being the only ones in our year group to first attend an 18th. My Dad let us come over to his house first and then he dropped us off at the venue. Part way through the night the DJ announced the room asking for an Eleanor Brian to come to the dancefloor. I got all excited wondering if I’d caught the attention from someone in the year above. All eyes in the room were on me when the DJ then said ‘your Dad wants to know if you’re having a nice time?’. It’s taken me 10 years to really see the funny side of that and how he desperately tried to stop us from taking life too seriously….

Dad loved hearing our travelling plans, but loved joining us even more (invited or not). When my sister and I had a girly weekend in Berlin, Dad flew out for the day and met us at the Brandenburg gate for a walking tour. When my sister was going on a work trip to Uganda, he kept asking “When am I coming?” and started checking flights. Lydia told him she probably wouldn’t have time to sightsee with her Dad on a work trip, but it was only when HR finally said he couldn’t come that he gave up – and instead settled for picking her up from the airport, holding a sign with her name on and wearing his chauffer’s hat, ready to hear all about the trip.

When my boyfriend Eddie and I told him we had booked to travel South America for 2 months, starting in Rio de Janero, he again said ‘oh great! When are we going?’. And sure enough he joined us in Rio for 5 days. Eddie and I wanted to not really plan our trip and just go with the wind. Dad had different ideas, and one day sat us down in his hotel room and made us plan our route, partly so we could make the most of our time there, and partly for safety so he knew where we would be each day. Without my Dad we wouldn’t have fit in half of what we did. At one point we lost track of time and it didn’t look like we could make it across Brazil in time to catch our flight home. I sent him a facebook message and within the hour he had booked Eddie and I a flight back to Rio because in his words ‘that’s what Dads do’.  

His trip to India and Nepal was also to join Lydia and Simon on their sabbatical year. He would never have missed the opportunity to see Everest or the Taj Mahal and was delighted to join them, booking a tour for the three of them to ensure they had the best experience.  

It broke his heart having to part ways as he left us to carry on our adventures abroad. But, Dad’s number one rule of life was ‘follow your instincts’. This is how he lived his life following where his heart is drawn to, last year this was as far as Antarctica. He was so proud to see his children exploring the world as he has done all his life. He was happiest knowing his family were happy. Whenever we came home, he routinely asked ‘have you had a nice time?’ and ‘what was our favourite bit?’. Even if I was just walking my dog in Liverpool, he still loved to check in & see if I was having a nice time.  

It breaks my heart he will never ask me this again. But our Dad was never far away and always checking in with us, so now he has passed over I know he won’t be far. He will be our new guardian angel, watching all our travels and graduations with pride as he always has. He lived his life with unconditional love for his wife and children. This won’t change now. I look fondly on all the traits I have inherited from Dad and I look forward to seeing these traits in my children too. Maybe one of them will love planes or Liverpool Football Club. Hopefully none of them will love Barry Manilow like my Dad did. Hopefully all of them will have my Dads zest for life, sense of humour and unconditional loving kindness.

In recent years whenever he’d say to me ‘that’s what Dads do’, I started to reply, ‘it’s not what Dads do, it’s what you do, and its what only the greatest Dads do’.

Our Dad

There was a young man who never thought he’d find

more to love than planes, travel, football and music to occupy his mind

Until two days when he became

A Dad to one, and a Dad to two, Lydia and Eleanor were their names

His mission was to see every corner of the Earth

And he got so very close, From Lapland to Antarctica, Rio to Perth

But there was no mission more important than being a great Dad

And in that there’s no question, he’s best Dad we could ever have had

Two little girls whose world was their oyster, who flew over their house in his plane,

Who knew all the words to Barry songs and who travelled again and again

I know given the chance he would have never left us,

There is no where we couldn’t go without him, and with his support and love he blessed us

He cycled and ran, to ensure he stayed fit and well,

He adored living, and never wanted to say farewell

Dad, I wish you could know the impact you had on me,

The traits I inherited I now treasure so dearly

You gave us so much support and help to get us through,

Without ever realising the biggest gift was you

Fly high my Dad, just like planes in the sky

On all my adventures, I knew you’d never leave me, which is why I never learned to say goodbye

Now is the time for you to see a new world beyond this birth,

And when I follow you, you will wrap me in your arms, the way you did when I arrived on earth.